Well dear readers, it has been a hell of a couple months. I have promised myself I will write up the experience of Mom in the nursing home, and then home to die, just because it was an amazing chapter in my life. (Hers too! A toast to transitions!) But later.
Some months ago I had registered for a seminar June 7 - 9 in Chicago, figuring whatever was happening I'd need a break by then. I'm so glad I did. We were absolutely pounded from May 29th - June 1st, putting together Mom's memorial service (it was the afternoon of the 1st). Even though her death was coming, and we could see it coming, we still were scrambling to get things together. Brother John & his wife Amy had made it in for Memorial Day weekend, so they got to see her just before she died. They stayed with me, necessitating the set up of the guest room and getting the place back together after clearing everything out of the ground floor, to get new floors on May 21 and 22. Memorial Day weekend, I slept on an air mattress in my bedroom, as I had been sleeping on the day bed, which is the guest bed (it has a trundle mattress so sleeps 2 just fine.) Well after Mom died, they zoomed home to work like crazy and get back up for the memorial service. We pulled together the service and I bought a bed (yay, Sam's Club) because sleeping on the floor? So not part of my lifestyle anymore unless I'm camping - and as the weather was getting warmer had to deal with the pool.
Side note: I must have been crazy buying a house. Ya know all that advice about not doing anything big right after a life changing transition like divorce? ... Ya should pay attention to that. At least I think I've been amusing the neighbors as I struggle my way through tasks that really need two people. Thank the Universe that they're kind and have been able to help me start the lawn mower, lend me extension cords to get the pool filter running, etc. Watching me figure out how to vacuum the pool must have been a riot!
The memorial service on June 1 went splendidly. We had anticipated having maybe 20 people, as Mom & Dad really left their old life a couple years ago when they moved to their assisted living place. So we picked the small chapel at the memorial park. Mom was cremated, so we planned some picture boards and a simple talk. The people at the memorial park moved us to the big chapel, as it was closer to her niche (for the 'inurnment'. Seriously, that's a word.) And it turned out to be good that we moved because 60 or so people showed up. There was a bus from Crimson Ridge, where Dad lives, discharging 10 people with walkers as we pulled up. 10 or so people from the library, where Mom had worked until she retired in 2000 came. Old neighbors were there, old coworkers of Dad, Mom's sister Pattie, her husband Bernie and my cousins Chris & Jeff made it in - from Florida and Ohio. Dad's brother Jerry, his wife Barbara and their eldest, cousin Julie, her husband Matt and their daughter Naomi made it in from New Hampshire. It was great to see everyone and Dad was very pleased with the event, which is all that really matters.
Monday after the service, Andrea and I started working the finances again. Whole new set of things to do. We did that for 2 days. Then I just went limp for a day. Thursday the 7th, I was sitting the the Rochester airport, waiting on my flight to Chicago. Started working up a real good pity party for me. Tears and everything. I seem to cry in that airport with every flight, lately. Anyhow, thank God I went to that seminar. Hear in your mind the sound of a needle screetching across a record - riiiipp - put an end to that wallow in self pity in a hurry. It was James Rays Harmonic Wealth weekend. Part rah rah James Ray show, mostly great information, many experiential exercises. I got lots of insights into my 'programming' and started really thinking about my mindset and thoughts. What a superb gift to myself. It was intense, too - started at 8 a.m. Friday, went til about 1:30 a.m. Saturday, picked back up at 8 a.m. Saturday, went til 12:30 a.m. Sunday.
I've been steeped in my revelations and working to redirect my life for the past of week. More on that to come, as well as pictures of my little houseen. I did have the ground floors redone on May 21 and 22nd, adding to the general chaos of my life at that time. But they are beautiful and odor-free! Now when I come downstairs in the mornings I smile at the beauty instead of wrinkling my nose at the doggy smell. I've gotten on top of lawn mowing, and can pretty reliably start up the mower when I want. The pool is starting to clear. The previous dwellers in this house didn't put it away clean - imagine that - and I've fished out 3 toys, 1 pair of swim goggles and several bushels of oak leaves so far. Hope to have it clear soon, as it's starting to feel like summer.
Well, gotta go now to my golf lesson, lovey. Do tell the manservant to have the cocktails cold by the time I get home.
